Doing your best

There are some things in life that are very hard to do. Some that you feel like your someone clawing at the ledges on a wall of rock, trying to climb up to freedom. We all have these examples in our lives, some sadly have more than others. No matter what your past is, it has shaped you into who you are. Hopefully, it is the best you that you can be.

There are two things in my life I try to keep as a constant: honesty, and helpfulness. If I am nothing else, I want to be a man of my word, a man that can be relied upon when things get rough and someone that others can go to when they need assistance. I know what it is like to go through hard times, and no one should go through any hard times alone. I wish no one else went through hard times, but alas that is something I cannot control. I wish I could though. It would be worth it to remove others pain in the world. It wouldn't matter to me if I was the only one to go through a rough time, if that be the case it would be worth it.

If I can protect those I care about from pain, and be one of my word, I will maintain a good life. At least my opinion of a good life. Which we are all entitled to our own thoughts on what makes a good life, as long as we live within what the ethical standards that society has set.

Because of this, I try to think before I act. Sometimes my brain takes turns to far down the dark corners of my mind, but it is for protection. If I am prepared for the worst, than what can surprise me? Granted, there are those things that come out of left field that leave me scratching my head wondering what happened, but with each one I learn and prepare better for the future.

One thing I always tend to do in one way or another, I tend to sabotage my chances of forming a bond/relationship with people at times due to this. It is something I need to work on, some confidence I need to grow, I just need to plant the seed for the slow growing bean stalk...hopefully it doesn't grow to high. Hopefully the root system, damages the foundation to some of the walls built over time. But, when I do wrong, I admit it, I know I am not the best at sharing at times, but when I have made a mistake, I am willing to admit it, around those that where there when I made the mistake.